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May 7, 2009

Be Respected

If anyone wants to be respected by others, wealth, clothing or physical attractiveness are not requirements. The way others perceive us isn't necessarily based on our level of education, what schools we may have attended or with whom we are acquainted. Respect is accorded to those who live respectable lives--that is, people that conduct themselves with integrity and treat others, in turn, with high regard. If we set the example by respecting ourselves - appreciating our own good qualities and using them to highlight the positive in other people's lives, then our example will be followed and that same regard will likely be shown to us in return. The most important thing to remember is that respect is earned; we must act respectably in order to receive the benefits.

Present yourself well. Have a bath or shower once a day, be well groomed and dressed neatly. Clothing doesn’t need to be expensive but it should be laundered and in good repair. Take care of your health and your teeth. Your smile will show to others that you enjoy your own company, and theirs too. Keep your language clean and respectable. Say positive things about others whenever possible, but be sincere - people can recognize the difference between true interest and forced flattery. Try not to be negative. It is easy to point out the downside of a situation, but if we make the effort to overcome our obstacles we can lead happier lives and be an encouragement to others. Find ways to assist those who need help and your own troubles will seem less overwhelming, and you feel better for doing it! Greet people in a proper and friendly manner. It is appreciated and returned by others, and makes you feel wonderful. Never bully others or take advantage of their weaknesses. Bullies are not respected because they don't show respect. Allow people to keep their dignity. Don’t act like a know it all. People do not appreciate it when you act superior to them.

Be a good role model. Set an example that others would like to follow. When another person imitates you, it is a sign of respect. If someone else has set a good example, let them know how much you appreciate it by your own actions. Be yourself. Don't join in with the latest craze just because others may be following the popular style. Respect yourself by making your own choice, this will bring respect from others. Give everyone a chance. Don't prejudge people, and be pleasant to everyone (until they give you a reason not to). Even if you realise someone is a jerk, always be civil and have class. People around you will respect that more than bad mouthing or confronting them in a mean way. Don't be overly materialistic. Stay focused on people rather than objects that may be lost or destroyed; people are so much more important and our true value is not what we have, it is the person we are inside that others will respect. But in the same vein pay attention to the fact that while materialism is not all of life, it is part of it. We all need things to survive, and while we always must remember that things are not everything and others aren't to be judged just on what they have, we must also keep track of our things and take care of them, conserve them and expect respect for our things from others. Just don't get it in your head that things are everything.
Respect yourself and others around you. - Keep your home and surroundings clean and well kept. Your neighbours will respect you and the neighbourhood will be a better place for everyone. Treating others with respect is the most important thing to do; if you treat someone with respect, they'll treat you with respect. State your boundaries. Clearly communicate what you are willing to accept and what the consequences for trespassing of these boundaries are. Do what you announced to do (or not to do) every time the trespassing happens. Example: If you want to go out to meet friends with your partner, inform them of the time and that you will leave at this time; whether they are ready or not. If your partner is not ready to go, leave the house without them. Do not let them call you back or change your plans in any way. Do not try to justify your actions, and refuse to accept blame. If at all, tell them that you informed them of the consequences and they are only suffering consequences that could have easily be avoided if they had played by the rules.

Remember that respect is something that people have to earn. It is given to those who live respectably! Bring beauty to your surroundings by giving your neighbors a pleasant view of your home and your personality. Invite the people in your neighborhood to draw near with genuine interest and friendliness. They will want to care about you, too.Remember that people notice the example your children are following. If you treat your children lovingly and teach them to have respect for yourself and others, you will be treated with respect also.

Especially remember to be respectful to bullies. If they take something from you, or start to tease you, say: "Can I have that back? And by the way, I love your hair". Don't shower them with compliments, as they will take advantage of that, but say something nice. It will easily throw them off guard. Sometimes, when this approach doesn't work, it will become necessary for you to defend yourself. If you try being nice to bullies and that does not work, you may have to show them you mean business. This may mean standing your ground, even physically, and even being willing to fight to defend yourself. This should be a last option, but should not be postponed indefinitely while meanwhile taking abuse; if someone threatens you in an unjust manner, and they can't be dissuaded with words, it is they who have chosen a fight and not you. Remember that this bully will respect nothing less than the person who doesn't fight back, but also is likely to leave you alone after having realized you are not a soft target. And by once again acting civil and even friendly to someone who has given up trying to harass you, you might just find that you effect a positive change in this person--even if the seeds take years to sprout.Try to find what you're good at, and use it. If you're a good singer, be in the school musicals, sing for events, etc. People will recogniae you and your talents. This is a great way to get 'well-known'.

Don't try too hard, people won't respect you because they will assume you are trying to be better than them. Don't pretend to be someone you're not. People might think you're insecure and fake. Therefore you won't be respected.